March 18, 2016

I finally figured things out, which is a good way to start my venture out of this doomed phase. If you are a reader, you can easily get what I am referring to, 'cause for the past months all I did was write what's inside the mind of a 22 year-old girl, having problems with adult-ing. And as you can see, mine was really messy. I am making this post now, as contrary to the previous ones I've made. I am writing this to help my lost, beloved self, and the stranger reading this at the moment, who might also be asking "What now?"

First, I am going to tell you .. This phase is normal. It's called "quarter-life crisis" (or mid-life crisis to some). Plus, I am no expert in life but here are the things I've learned/realized so far ...

 It's supposed to be JUST a phase, it's up to you how long you'll stay in it.

➳ MIND OVER MATTER. If all you do is doubt and think of the negative, you'll never get out.

There's no point in comparison. Mind your own business. - Your friend might be getting married in a month, someone your age might have purchased his own house already, an old mate might be having a promotion in his first job .. while you are here lying on your bed, watching kdramas all day. I know how hard the situation is, so quit being tough on yourself and stop comparing, it will lead you to nothing.

Start claiming what you WANT to be.

The most important of it all is think that you CAN. You can't jump on the "act" phase without starting on the "think" phase. Again, MIND OVER MATTER!!!

Let's say, your goal is to become a ''successful adult'', you must become an adult first .. then success will be easier to reach.

Fake it until you make it.  - It's hard, I know. Being used of always depending on someone or something your whole life.. adult-ing might be stressful. But you should accept that you are here now and you can't go back! Teenage will never happen again. So start acting like a real adult, until you're not acting anymore. How? ...

Lessen the ranting, whining and complaining. Do the job instead.

Plan a WISE routine and do it everyday. Gone are the days of whole day Facebook + sleepless nights on YouTube, ayt?

Be more productive. Learn a new skill or improve a talent. Focus on becoming better than the person you are before.

Seek for inspiration. As for me, reading encouraging blogs works. They're great source of motivation.

Dream a new dream. 20 something is still young. If your dreams when you are in college didn't work out, having a new dream now that you are older and wiser than before is not a bad idea, I guess? 

Keep in mind that you can't stop now. Despite all your doubts and fears.

Only you, can figure out what you want, and you are the only person who can help yourself in getting it.


Be grateful of what you have with you, and you'll feel better.

Smash the idea that you're inside the quarter-life crisis.

Lastly, pray. That eventually, He will help you in whatever you are going through. And BELIEVE that His plans for your life are always better than your plans.

Today might be a little blur, but who knows what tomorrow will bring?

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  1. Nice blog! :D Good advices.:)

  2. Super agree with you on this one. Enough of the dramas and focus on things that do matter and work on productivity rather than dwell on nothing.

  3. You know what, I've experienced "quater life crisis" several times the moment I became 20-ish. And, yes it's a normal thing. I loved how you that you shared what you learned afterwards. And, I agree to this one --> mind over matter. We can do it ("we" referring to all individuals who are experiencing the same thing). Thank you for your article! :D

  4. We all go through this phase and just like you said, it's just a phase. The problem with some people is that they don't let it just be a phase and instead dwell on their situation longer than they should. I admit to being like that, but things eventually changes overtime (thankfully). You are indeed, still young. Just hang in there and relax. You're not supposed to figure it all out yet so just have fun for now haha...

  5. we all have troubles with adulting at some point in our lives, and yes, it is just a phase.

    you have such great realizations and you are one lucky enlightened gal, not most people realize these things at 22!

    life might be crazy at times, but it will be okay eventually. remember to keep a positive view of the world, and yes, pray!


  6. "➳ Lessen the ranting, whining and complaining. Do the job instead."

    I hope a whole lot people will get to read this good advice of yours.

    I have a different problem back then, because of our circumstances when I was a kid (selling newspapers and biko), I think I missed teen-age life and matured fast.

    8 years ago, when i bought my son a big remote control car as present for his birthday, wifey noticed that I was the one playing and having a great day, and my son is just watching, haha! - Sonnie

  7. we all go through such phase and I agree with you, it is mind over matter.. i think if one has a positive disposition in life, he or she can make it through in no time!
    In addition to that, these challenge will give you experience and your experience will give you a lesson and the lessons will make you a lot stronger as a person!

  8. I suppose we all grow up in our own rhythms. Some of us join the "normal world", some of us don't and it's no shame in that. Almost all my highschool colleagues are married, have children, have a 9-5 job and a family to come back to after. Their concerns are a better apartment, a better car, an all inclusive holiday once a year. I suppose that's the normal life. I am still struggling to find my way, what I really want to do. At the moment, this is traveling. Yes, I do have a 9-5 job but it does let me travel for 3 weeks at a time each year, to go and do my thing. Yes, I do spend some weekends in my pijamas, in my bed, watching series on my laptop. So what? :)

  9. I also wrote a blog post about why it's okay to be a lost 20-something and I definitely agree with your points! We all have times where we question what we're doing with our life, or if we're contributing something essential to society, so much to the point that we make it an excuse not to do anything about it.

  10. On point, you nailed it! Shake off dramas and get your head focus on the important things in life!

  11. a lot of millennials go through the "adulting" phase with the same realizations, glad to hear you're out of it!

  12. This is true. "Lessen the ranting, whining and complaining. Do the job instead." Just focus on important things and make things happen.

  13. "Mind over matter" and "Be grateful" are two of my favorite mantras in life. Life will never be perfect no matter what stage in your life you are in. I learned just to be grateful and look at the positive side in everything. And I love being so optimistic because it make me look forward to the many things in life :)

  14. "you should accept that you are here now and you can't go back" --- this is super true. I do have days that I feel I should have done things differently before, but I realized all you have to do is accept the now, and work your way up from today. Thanks for this inspiring post!!


About Ronalene

I am a teacher by profession from Bulacan, Philippines.
I blog about my life in general -
I document my travels, little advocates, adulting process and the art of slow living.
I'm an introverted extrovert so please don't ask me to make beauty vlogs. Thank you.